Terms of Service
By using this site, you affirm your consent to the following Terms of Service ("Terms"):
Use of any automated script, program, application, app, or other software ("Software"), whether distributed or centralized, mobile, desktop, server, mainframe, or cloud based ("Computer"), to send email, MMS, SMS, tweets, texts, calls, or other messages of any length or type ("Messages"), or submit online forms on this site ("Forms") to the owners, operators, administrators, or other visitors of this site ("Victims") subjects the controller of said Software ("Scumbag") to the following penalties:
- Scumbag will assign to each Victim all claims of copyright, ownership, and title of Messages to which Scumbag is otherwise entitled.
- Scumbag will publically apologize to each Victim in the forum of the Victim's choice.
- Scumbag will immediately cease and desist attempting to send any similar Messages to Victim(s).
- Scumbag will immediately terminate and destroy Software previously used to initiate Messages to Victim(s).
- Scumbag will immediately reveal to Victim(s) the name(s), contact information, and any and all associated agreements Scumbag entered into with any third parties who may have compensated Scumbag to send Messages to Victim(s).
- Scumbag will immediately make payment of $1,000,000 ("One Million US Dollars") to each Victim.
- Scumbag will immediately pay treble direct costs and actual damages for any remediation or mitigation activities required by Victim(s) to make his/her/their system(s) whole.
So don't do anything stupid.
This policy incorporates by reference both our Privacy Policy and our User Agreement. In the event a court of competent jurisdiction holds any provision of these terms unenforceable, the remainder of the terms will remain in full force and effect.
Finally, we reserve the right to change these Terms at any time and in any way, without notice to you or anyone else.
So don't rely on these Terms to stay as friendly as the are.
